What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

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What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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Cliterus

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Why do those Indian people have that dot on their forehead ? Idk but it makes a good target.

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Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

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Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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