A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

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A man with glasses and a cane walks out if a clothing store and accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking his hat off "Can't you watch where you're going?" the woman asks. The man then slaps her, knocking her to the ground. He picks up his new designer fedora, and drives off in his $90,000 Cadillac. The woman, after dusting herself off, gets the guy's plates, convinces a few witnesses to testify against the man, and informs the authorities of an assault. He was later arrested for assault as well as pimping and soliciting sex. He is found guilty in a court of law and is sentenced to 2-5 years in prison, and is doled a hefty fine.

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What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

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Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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The 19th Amendment

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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How do you kill a black person? Make them skydive 10,000 feet in the air without a parachute

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Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

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Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops