Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

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my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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What did the man say when he had sex for the first time "So how come I'm the one with the vagina"?

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how do you make a cat blink? strike him with a hammer.

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

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roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here I don't get it

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how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

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Q: Why did the black man have a gun? A: We was recently indicted for insider trading and preferred suicide to a long prison sentence.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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A woman comes at the doctor.

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

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The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

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If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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