Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

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What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

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What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Some guy: Which of these is not delicious,watermelon,chicken,or kool aid. Black guy: What?

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Jersey Shore.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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