Three men walk into a bar, they are promptly served and then they go home. Later that evening the bartender closes the bar and goes upstairs to his apartment where he is struggling with his debt... Business hasn't been as good these days.

Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

a

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...