If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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Knock knock Who's there? A ghost A ghost who?

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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whats worse than killing people that have bags on their heads? finding out that the people that u have just killed were your own children.

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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Did you hear about the sale on the toyota cars from japan? if you can get it out of the water its free!

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops