If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

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Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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your face

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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