Wolf Pussy

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How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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A inventor was wandering around the desert one day, then he found a magic lamp, he rubbed on it and thus came up a genie! The genie asked: What do you want? The inventor responded: Meh, no idea... Thy wish is granted, answered the genie. The now ex inventor never came up with something new ever again.. Moral: Huh?

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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People just dont care about me, yesterday I got a coconut in my head and... AWWWW thats horrible! Yeah I... So did the coconut make it?

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bucket of chicken? A lot.

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How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

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Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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A blonde and a brunette are out for drinks. The brunette goes home early as she has to be up the next day.

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what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

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What if there were no hypothetical questions?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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