Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

Doris was putting up Christmas lights when he noticed the bulb's suddenly came on. He was puzzled at first, as he hadn't plugged them in. He climbed down the ladder and found that it was his son, Robby who had plugged the lights in.

What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

When the loaf of bread crashed the car the wife was mad. What do you think she did? She put Nutella on him toasted him and then ate him

What's worse than stepping on a Lego? Leukemia

Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...