a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

Mcfly: Doc! i have to tell you about the future! Doc: Ok.

A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

What do you call a blonde prostitute your bitch

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

Fiats

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

YOLO.

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...