there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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