What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

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I shot a bitch.

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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Hi is the longest two letter word in the world

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow" you don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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