Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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justin littleton. nuff said

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Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

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Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

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How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Of course, first door on your left

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

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a chinese wompus came out of the basement.

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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Yo momma so fat you have aids

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What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

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Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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