knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

Yo momma is so fat that she is large.

Why does the Muslim go to Hollywood? Because he is gifted in acting. He believes Hollywood will give him a wider range of career opportunities.

hi iggy

Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

Train A leaves the station at 1:42 while traveling in 176kmh. How long will it take for the conductor to realize the bridge it ou... Too long.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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