What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you have Canasta!!! Were not playing canasta you stupid asshole

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What's for dinner? Flesh from when your brother was alive and your blood.

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So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

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you know whats not funny white boards.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

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Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

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Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

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watch me nae nae

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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