How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Roses are red, They are also violet, yellow, white, pink, orange, purple, or orange.

emma: mat has a quick reaction time

Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

What's brown and sticky? A penis.

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

How to confuse a dumbass: see previous post.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

What do you call a gay black man? Whatever his name happens to be

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

What iz stupid? Hibiyav

When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

if life gives you lemons you probably have problems

dude ur such a bon of a sitch

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

What is difference about : Pizza and Jews on the Holocaust? Pizza don't scream when she gets into the oven!

What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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