Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Why was the Tortous and the Hare written? So fat people will feel good about themselves.

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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