roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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It's long!

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One scientist is talking to another scientist. One say "what's the matter?" The other replies "my family is dead"

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What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

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Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

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whats green andthrows forks at you? a blonde painted green in a bush wih a gun and a fly on her eye

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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God

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There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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What is Obamas favorite book? I don't know, ask him.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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Windows Vista

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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