What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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make me a sandwich!

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Q: what do you call obama A:a dumbass

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

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Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

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What do Michael Jordan and LeBron James have in common? They both have won NBA championships...except for Lebron.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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