I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

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Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

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what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

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who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

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A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

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What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

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anti jokes r not funny, jk, thats a joke, i bet sum of u losers will like this cuz all of these jokes r horrible

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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