What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says why the long face. The horse, unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

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Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

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What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

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Man 1: What's blue and goes blub blub? Man 2: I don't know what? Man 1: A blue blub blub. What's green and goes blub blub? Man 2: A green blub blub? Man 1: There's no such thing as a green blub blub you moron.

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? killing their parents first.

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when do you go to heaven? Never

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Q. What is the answer to life? A. 34

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Why didn't the Asian student ask for a calculator? Because he was busy washing the dishes and thought a calculator would be completely inappropriate for the situation at hand.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor, Doctor! have you heard the news? Doctor: Yes.

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Why did paul macartny have plastic surgery? Because he wasn't happy with the looked

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doctor doctor i need help i stay up all night dancing what is it? dance fever! HAHAHAHA its fatal.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender refuses to give the woman alcohol because he acknowledges a health risk for her unborn child.

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A fridge.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have babies? She's dead.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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A man walks into a party, walks over to the snack stand, and is surprised to find that there is no punch line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops