Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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Yo mamma is so old that she died.

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What did the black say when an asian knocked him out? Nothing, he was knocked out

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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How do you make a 6-year-old cry again? Tell him that without further change to the system, he'll end up paying $100,000 for school and then not have a job when he graduates.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What do you call a joke without a punchline?

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A cowboy rides out to the middle of nowhere and then shoots his horse. He then makes his way back into town and meets a man in the saloon. The man says, "On second thought, I'd like to buy that horse."

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing - because she had no arms Knock Knock Who is it Not Susie

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i like cats

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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hi

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How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

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Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

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That was SOOOOO funny that I laughed!!!!!

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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