Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did th teacher say to the student? be quiet and do our work

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I'm a boy... I like hamburgers... Xbox is my favorite activity.... I have a dog... My dad is cheap... He's my doctor, my dentist, and my mom... Haha get it?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you make a homosexual man have sex with a woman? shit in her vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops