I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Penis-Pump

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AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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FUCK YOU NEVEN

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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What is the best game in the world? There is no answer because that would be an opinion and opinions cannont be proved or measured.

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What would u like to drink?

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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