What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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no

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-What's the difference between a frog? - it jumps higher.

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The gay man came out of the closet.....Not that he wanted the world to know about his alternative lifestyle but because he is fairly wealthy and keeps his trousers on hangers in the rear of his walk in closet.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a fox? An eaten chicken.

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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Man 1: What's blue and goes blub blub? Man 2: I don't know what? Man 1: A blue blub blub. What's green and goes blub blub? Man 2: A green blub blub? Man 1: There's no such thing as a green blub blub you moron.

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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What is the difference between dead babies and a corvette? There is no corvette in my garage

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

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Goodbye Nero, it is good to see that you are the man that we still admire so much, except better, wiser than we thought you would be, stronger, if broken inside by unhappiness, you cannot change this world into what it could have been, and neither should you take that burden upon your shoulders anymore.

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Womens Rights

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

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Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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