You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

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Why did the plane crash? Because there was no pilot

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The foreskin of a baby gorilla

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? No Neither did she

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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So there's this moose right? And he walks into the store and asks where the potatoes are. And the cashier lady says aisle 5. So the moose walks to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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I was Born ready I was born naked.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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knock knock who's there? boo don't do this joke again- i'll make you cry if you finish it don't cry it is just a knock knock joke teeheehee

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Why did the blonde go to business school? She wanted to get into business, and decided that a business degree was a good place to begin.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Why couldn't the black man get a high-paying job? because he lived during the harsh and cruel times of slavery.

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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