My brother found a worm in his apple. I dared him to eat it, so he did. When he tried to swallow, the mashed up worm congealed in his throat, killing him. Later, I found out that the worm had poisonous rectum fluids. I was given the Nobel Peace prize.

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What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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you are driving down the highway, if two birds make a bee then how many pies can fly at once? None because I can't read

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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The lion swallowed his pride.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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Question : Why did the boy need to change his pants? Answer: During recess, the little boy was running to fast and fell on the ground. Then kid he has been bullying pissed on his leg.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

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Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive? A:Because she is a woman A: She is blind deaf and dumb A: No seriously because she is dead.

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knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

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Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

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If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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I see said the blind man, to his deaf wife, as the cripple ran by.

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops