What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

ur gay and this joke sucks

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats something thats red and swings A baby on a meat hook

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you hit a clown off a swing? There are many was of acting upon this situation but the most successful approach would be hitting the clown with a heavy object,

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the 1, Blondes aren't any dumber than anyone else. It's a myth.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man cry? Because his mom died in a terrible car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops