Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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Buzi vagy!

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What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

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What did the great political leader say in order to calm the riot. There were no definable words. He merely screamed as the riot swallowed him and tore him apart.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

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Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

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who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? James and austin!!!!

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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