Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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What do you call a black man in jail Your dad

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Guess what? Holocaust

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Banana(s)

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

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What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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what makes reed stop talking? LYRENS SHARPENED PENCIL

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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You know what I'm thinking of right now? Eyebrows

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why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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9:11 make a wish

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what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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