What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

thumb_up thumb_down +23

knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

thumb_up thumb_down +41

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A homeless man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says it'll be $4.50. The homeless man doesn't have any money so he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i was molested.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's a good joke? Not this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I've got a dig bick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down

Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Daym im romantic

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops