Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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what is the entire jewish population minus about 13 million? The Holocaust.

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A house comes around the corner.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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A man dressed in a business suit goes into a doctor's office. He asks the receptionist how much a vasectomy would cost. After a minute of her looking it up on the computer she turns to him and says "The procedure will cost $750." He then thanks her and leaves.

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Kittens.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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why did the girl cry because she was raped

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Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

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What's big, white, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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