What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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what happened to the autistic child that traveled to antarctica? he died.

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What did the sick kid get for cancer? Christmas

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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your momma's an antijoke

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What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

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How do you keep a blond in suspense?

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Why couldn't Jenna play double dutch? Because she had no friends.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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What happens when a building has a 13th floor ? You realize this isn't a del building and fall down 13 flights.

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What do you tell the woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

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i love antijokes

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What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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What's funnier than killing a bunch of orphans? killing their parents first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops