So a black man hails a taxi...

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

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Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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What is the best part about being in bed with twenty eight year olds? There are twenty of them

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? It's everybody in the world telling you to stop re-using this joke.

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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What do you call a gay man flying an aeroplane? A pilot.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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What's a zombie's favourite dessert? I don't know, but I'll give you 50 bucks to go and ask one.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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A man walks by with a bat. A little girl crosses the street. He hits her with it because she is a little shit. A homeless atheist sees and reports it immeaditately to the authorities because it was child abuse.

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how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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