What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Here's a little diddy I wrote for One Direction: Now One Direction, don't forget that we all know About the antics that you pull at your own live shows Like you take your own lyrics and give 'em a swerve Now they either make no sense or make you sound like pervs And Liam, why you swiping cameras and phones? What you need a girl's number cause you're crusin alone? And another thing, it's a frickin spoon for God's sake What did this thing impale your puppy with a giant frickin stake? And so One Direction, we now all think That in about a year, y'all are gonna go N*SYNC and disappear cause N*SYNC isn't around any...aw you know!

What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

What do you put in a toaster? Bread, or sometimes a small penis.

If you don't get this joke, you're gay.

A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

Why do vampire's from 'Twilight' sparkle? Because it's a really bad movie.

Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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