What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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The WNBA.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

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Caolan and Eamon

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

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:O + :P = 69

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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Like if you like big tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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