What's worse than a spider bite? Two spider bites. What's worse than two spider bites? The fact that 1/3 of people get cancer. What's worse than that? Three spider bites.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The Pittsburgh Pirates

thumb_up thumb_down -1

W.N.B.A.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was Thomas Jefferson chosen to write the Declaration of Independence? He was an educated man and seemed suitable for said job.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was there an awkward silence? Because numerous people gathered in a room were not talking.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why did the child fall? A: Because I shot him in the leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

hey

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

thumb_up thumb_down -48

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What came first, the chicken or the egg? This is a psychological question which the egg came from the chicken, but the chicken also came from an egg, so the world may never know exactly.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

PIED NINNY!

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops