What did the Jewish kid get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

Kim Kardashian.

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

Dig a big hole in your front yard and wait next to it so when people walk by they'll ask "Why is there a hole in your front yard?" to whcih you will reply "I don't know. Do you wanna play Monopoly?"

Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Well, it depends on how many Jews there are and what kind of car it is.

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

Why did the man go to the hospital Because he was hurt

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

What did one salt shaker say to the other salt shaker? Nothing, Salt shakers are merely used to add flavor to foods.

What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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