You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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What did the Mexican overdose on to die. Nothing, he died of old age

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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What do you get a when you cross a chocolate bar and some haribo? A disease complex characterized by persistent hyperglycemia caused by insufficient insulin production or resistance to the metabolic action of insulin. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is generally classified as insulin-dependent (IDDM, type I), non-insulin-dependent (NIDDM, type II), or secondary diabetes mellitus

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What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

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How many spots does a giraffe have? Depends on the giraffe.

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whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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hi

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Many of people would like to know this question. We have not invented a mind reading device and chickens can't communicate with humans. So no one knows

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What did you get for your birthday? I got older

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Obama = ebola

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go go gadget

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops