whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

Guy- Wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah, it's too long. Girl- Wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Nah, you'll never get it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It can never be certain, as chickens are incapable of communicating.

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

What's the difference between an orange and a banana? they're spelled differently

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

why couldn't the one armed man juggle because it was snowing outside and his one room flat was to small

what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he was dead.

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

What happens when you bite the head off of two animal crackers and make them play leap frog? Nothing. Quit playing with your food.

Q: What do you do when you find a black man bleeding from a bullet wound on your front porch? A: Call an ambulance! He may only have minutes to live before he bleeds to death! Hurry!

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

I know you are but what am I? Gay.

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

poop nuff said

I saw my friend stabbing a girl. i asked what is he doing "Oh im just killing time" turns out the girls name is Time Demson. What a weird name i thought to myself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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