When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's raape?

I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...