Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did Delaware? A: A black dress. She was on her way to her father's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Dear Reader I am writing to express my complete and utter disdain toward the subject of your face. Rarely have I to witness such a repugnant sight. I would like to inform you that, upon most regrettably witnessing your face, my delicate stomach muscles gave way, and my morning meal, of lightly buttered Kipper and freshly squeezed orange juice most unfortunately ended up in one of the seventeen human waste disposal outlets to adorn my manor house. I struggle to comprehend how you, being such a selfish sadist, are able to live with yourself, knowing how much dismay you have caused me. Might I suggest that you pay a visit to a prosthetic plastic surgeon, in order to prevent other innocent's to suffer as did I. I request politely, but please be firmly assured in the knowledge that I will complain to the magnificent force of the police should you not comply with my reasonable request. Your face simply can not be allowed to exist in it's current form. I would go so far to say that it may be a danger to the elder's of our society, with their regrettably weak hearts.

thumb_up thumb_down

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Yeah, I assumed so, but I got kinda worried at the same time. Huh... The catchthing says trolololol, no coincidence at all huh? Anyway, take that last comment Nero, I am spent.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what's better than animal crackers? your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the police say to the black man who just shot his wife? You are under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops