what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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Chuck Norris does not get sick; He only gets sick when his immune system is weak.

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waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

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So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

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Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

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Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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Why did the duck eat the fish? It needed protein.

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This is a Poem, your Adopted

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I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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why did the disabled man go to the shops? because he wanted a radiator panel

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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