What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the chicken cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Do you know what's not right? Left.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

thumb_up thumb_down +17

1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is white and red all over? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Your Mother

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How did th-A fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A midget walks under a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops