Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

24

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A white man, a black man, and a woman are drinking in the local pub. The black man and the woman are hanged. Medieval European pubs did not permit either.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What was Hellen Kellers biggest mistake? Knock knock jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What does the president and the prime minister of china have in common, Sickle cell anemia. 342

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Michael Jackson is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the plane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops