What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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Why does Justin Beiber look like a girl? Because he achieved international fame and fortune at a prepubescent age, and has made more money before he turned 18 than most people will in their entire lives.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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roses are red poo is poo

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Mitt Romney penis

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? Although being a much easier potential victim, no one has raped the mentally challenged man.. yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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