What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow you just don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement."

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? a lot.

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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Do you like apples? Yes

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, one swipe, maestrostalfos, imdesiringyourhair, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAAAAAAAAAA know what i mean, paul are you ok?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

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A casual web surfer logs onto a website and reads half a joke.

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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