Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind and is a women, who are notoriously bad drivers.

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

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When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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What did the man with the gun say to the man without the gun? I have a gun

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

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what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Hi

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What a wonderful life!!! *gunshot*

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what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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