Roses are red, Violets are red, My house is red, I am on fire

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What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A tragic drowning victim. And later, food for sharks, probably.

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Why can't Albert Einstein hold down a job? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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peter charastabopouloulous

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What is more dangerous than heroine? T.J. Lane

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A man walked into a bar. I shot him

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a toothpick

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Your moms so stupid that she called me to get my number

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hey guys im gay

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Why did the cat have hair? Because he did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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