Canada

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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Women's rights

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

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What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

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What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

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What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

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wat is osama bin ladin's favorite sport grenade catch

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What's worse than finding a dead baby in a trash can? -Finding a dead baby in 5 trash cans

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I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

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As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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