What is a quicker way to transfer money than electronic banking? Keeping it on one's person and getting mugged for it, or else handing it over in a mutual deal.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

A blond, a brunnet and a read head all fall off a cliif, wich one did not die They all died you idiots

How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

I have to tell you something. What? I just told you something.

A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

Knock knock Get off my porch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

Q:Wy could't lily sleep at night? A: Becasue her eays were stappeld open.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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