What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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What did John say to Trojan? Hi Trojan

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Why did the computer crash? Because it had too much alcohol.

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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What do you call a boy with one arm one leg and an eye patch? Names

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What's red and green and goes around and around? A frog in a blender

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

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So there is 10 Nazis and a monkey the rest doesn't matter but i farted...

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Why do dogs lick their balls? Why? Because they can.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

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chuck noris- can swim through land god- can walk on watter i- can run on air

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What's a ghost's favourite country? Fraaaaance.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

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identical jokes get different votes.

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I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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