sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

knock knock whos there Aids, now you've got it

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Two people went to a planetarium to see a movie about the solar system. They came out smarter than when they had first walked in.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

If there are 3 apples, and you take 2, how many do you have? BLAM! Texas castle law, motherfukker!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Womens' Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops