What's old and wrinkly? old people

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Why do Indian people smell like curry? They don't. Its an ignorant misconception.

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

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Set up Punch line.

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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When does George Harrison take a shit? In the morning

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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