What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

A postal worker creeps past a sleeping bulldog. The dog does not wake up, and the mail is delivered successfully.

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

You`re honor, he fell off the staircase, I demand that staircase ends up in jail! Case closed.

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

LMFAO - "WE runnin' through these hoes like Drano?" Is that really what society has sunken to? Is this really what is accepted? Is this what we are jamming into children's moralities? Society is Screwed!

A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

a boy says hi.The girl says bye. The boy starts to cry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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