A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

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What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

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Do you believe that if I theoretically am unmatched in many ways, would feel less alone if I decided to become more like the rest?

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Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

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Why was the Mexican socially inept. Because he hadn't recieved a good education

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Immigration Laws

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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A muslim walks into a gun shop

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

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what does the muslim guy say in a very busy metro station? jaallalalalalalalalla BAM

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National security?

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops