What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

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How do Mexicans have sex? They get in bed, and the man puts his dick in his partner's vagina.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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Hitler and Jews become friends.

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AND

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Knock Knock! Who Is it? You, Tig

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Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

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What is pink and gets wet a tounge

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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why did the baby have a hole in its head? it was shot

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What did the squirrel say to the owl? Nothing, because owls and squirrels don't talk, but the owl ate the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

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Women's sports

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Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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What's the best type of silence in a family? None, all families should be open in communication.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Because he was bringing food to support his wife and 3 kids whom were very hungry and needed it to survive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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