Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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An irishman walks into a bar and orders a beer.

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Yes.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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