What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? finding a real joke on anti-joke

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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Why did the blond couldn't put a piece of meat into her mouth? Because she was vegetarian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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What did the doctor say to the man with cancer? You have cancer.

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Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

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Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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What does two plus two equal? 4

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Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

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Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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