A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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kyle dosnt eat dick...

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What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

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Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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I LIKE TRAINS

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Penis jokes.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops