Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

A man walked into a bar. He got drunk. What did u think he'd do, have coke-a-cola? Dumbass.

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

A bear wakes up from hibernation and is hungry. He sees a nearby forest cabin and decides to see if he can find food inside. The bear breaks into the cabin and thus the people staying there frantically run away to call animal control.

What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

How did the blond's brain cells die? She had a very acute case of Parkinson's disease.

Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

How do you wake up Lady GaGa you set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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