how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

Teacher: "What is the outside layer on a tree?" Dog: "Bark" Teacher: "How would you describe the desert surface?" Dog: "Rough" Teacher: "Would you say that Abraham Lincoln was an intelligent man?" Dog: "Yarp"

How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

Whats the difference between a black an white guy? They have different skin tones

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

Knock Knock. Who's there? (Knocker runs for his life).

A teenage boy walks into a bar, he doesn't even know he's slowly drinking his life away

Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

How many Black People does it take to change a lightbulb? One. Changing a lightbulb is a very simple task.

pinky ponky went a bit wonky oh no plz dont go or i will rape you untill you know

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

whats 2+2? 1

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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