What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Opinions are like assholes. I'm not sure how they are alike, but that seems to be the general consensus.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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Women's rights

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Why aren't elephants allowed in public pools? Because they are elephants.

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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roses are black violets are black your going to die with hate and sorrow

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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What do you say to Michael and Justin? The Game

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Sarah got hit by a bus.... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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