Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh no! Someone's been murdered in my garden!

"Knock, knock!" "Who's there?" "The police." "'The police', who?" "Sir, come out of your domicile with your hands up and no weapons present. You've just gone to an orphanage and massacred almost every nun who's worked there for almost five years. Not only that, but your son has also contracted AIDS from his previously lesbian girlfriend whom she has lost her mother too in the orphanage accident you've just caused."

THE GAME

Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

What's bad about a Hispanic Women and a White man dating? A: Nothing at all really, unless either of them become involved in drugs, alchohol, or unprotected sex, which can ruin any relationship.

yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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