A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

Aodhan Hearty

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

Blind people can't read this.

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

Q: A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? A:They both take turns, because they are driving across the country and it would be hard for one of them to drive the entire way.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

Why did Moses cross the road? He wanted to play Xbox with his friend Jeff. Moses was a 12 year old boy from California.

How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Marijuana

Q: How do turn water into wine. A: You don't.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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