Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

What happened when the Arabic man went through airport security? He was racially profiled and stopped, delaying not only him but the line of people behind him.

Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

Guess what happened when a man took off his jumper?? He became cold!

What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

Where can you find the best black man soup? I don't know. Cannibilism is no longer socially acceptable.

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

The Charlotte Bobcats

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

A man visits his doctor for an annual checkup. "Doc, I feel great! I'm running 5 miles a day, I just got promoted at work, and sex with my wife has never been better!" A few weeks later, his doctor calls him in. When he arrives, the doctor looks at him grimly. "I have some bad news. You have lung cancer." "But how? I don't smoke. My wife doesn't smoke. I have never felt better." The doctor pats him on the back, reassuringly. "This may be true, but you still have lung cancer."

I have an idea! You leave.

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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