what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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A: why did the kid run out of lead B: because his dad broke into his house raped his wife and stoll everything he owned

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

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True or False : it would not cause a public disturbence to express your P0rnagraphy to the public??? true. P0rnagraphy is the freedom of speech and ability to express oneself

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Gay's

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

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what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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