how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

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Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

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call me maybe.

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How do you get a chicken to cross the road? Get him in the other side

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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Why did Steven Hawking walk into a bar? He didn't he can't walk

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Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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Patriarchy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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