How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

There were two muffins in an oven. They were forgotten about by the baker so they cried, caught fire, burned to death, and formed a medium-sized pile of ashes.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

do u like chicken ? ....no good...cuz its for black people.

What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

yo mama's so fat because when women are pregnet thay gain weight for there child to feed on

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

what did the drunk man say to the bar tender? Hello good sir. Fine day today isn't it.

Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

Creepy Man: Let's play the rape game Young Girl: No!!!! Creepy Man: That's the spirit

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an apple? I don't cum on an apple before I eat it.

How did Elmo get his show? Because the kids loved his furry ass and hoped to be on with dorthy

Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

Michael Brown

A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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