nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Whats the difference between a fire hydrant and the color green? They're both green. Except the fire hydrant.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

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Give a man a fire and he will be warm for the rest of the night. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

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Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

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Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

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What can fly for only a short period? A jumper.

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arse

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A Mexican, a Caucasian, and an African-American jump out of an airplane. They all die.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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