Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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What did the racist say to the other racist? Hey how was yesterday's clan meeting?

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whats bonged in and looks like milk? harry after some cani

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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why did sally drown cause she was black

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

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Q: What's your favorite song? A: Not one in particular. I like all kinds of music.

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What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

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What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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What do you call it when you mix a raccoon with an 18-wheeler? A bloody mess on the highway. That smells like cheese

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

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What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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