I milked the cow, but no gas came out.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Skrillex.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

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how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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What did the fat girl use on Wii Fit? Cheat Codes.

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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why did i fall? i got pushed!

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Whats sad about 4 black guys in a cadillac driving over a cliff? A cadillac seats 5

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The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

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Why didn't Johnny go to the party? He was aborted as a fetus

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

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What do you call a black person who just received a bachlors degree from Havard? A very educated human being.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

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How do you divide 3426 by 78.6? With a calculator

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Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops