A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the guy fly? Because he steped on a landmine

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What was so funny about the death of Michael Jackson? A: There wasn't anything funny. He was one of the best pop stars ever and many people loved him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the girl who's father was murdered do at her wedding? not have a father daughter dance.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

We can never ask enough hypothetical questions, can we? Well?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock! Who's there? Oh, they were just nailing a notice of foreclosure to the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

thumb_up thumb_down +15

HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Knock Knock Who's there? Kconk Kconk who? Kconk Ohw Oh yeah, sorry mate, didn't recognise your voice! Come on up, I've got some lagers in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

68 :)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Wanna hear something funny? Sure. Okay,cool

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call it when a homosexual from spain is forced to have sex with a 400 pound black man? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -57

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make a homosexual man have sex with a woman? shit in her vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops