An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

What do you call a saxaphone playing unicorn, that's flying away to a distant planet on a penguin? a dream

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

She is so fast We call her Email Instead of Emily...

Whats a cat? A cat!

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

Why did the chicken cross the road Because he was Pierre preasured by all you assholes Saying he already did it so now he feels like he Has to do it.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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