A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

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Why couldn't the blond turn the TV on? Because she is blond.

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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What did Mr. Pazdzioch and Mr. Hahn and Mr. Fishers big ass do for fun? Ate Mr. Kilgores shit at shin-go-beek jamboree.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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Life

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call it, he isn't coming. Posted By: Lram

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Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

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What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

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what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

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What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

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why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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