Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

What do you call a lettuce named Andrew? Andrew.

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

There once were two muffins in an oven, and one definitely did not start talking to the other

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a horrible pedophile and has deeply seeded emotional problems

What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

What do you call two grown Mexican men playing tennis? Two adults showcasing their talent in a friendly game of tennis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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