What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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Life is like a box of chocolates, quite strange to enjoy when you're single.

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what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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i have yougurt with tractor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people nit make the mistakes he did

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Why didn't the blonde make it in a gun circle? The blonde yelled "Fire"

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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Why can't february march Because april may

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your moms soooooo FAT that she went on a diet and became really sexy

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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What's black, white and red all over? Nothing, I'm colourblind.

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what did the purple horse say to the goat? horses don't talk....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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