KEVIN HART

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

knock knock. who is there ? nobody.you have no friends.

What's half of 8? o

A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

What did the black boy find on his doorstep A package from his grandparents in Australia

What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

Why can't a T-Rex masturbate? Because dinosaurs have been extinct nearly 65 million years, due to an asteroid collision with the Earth

What do a snake and a bird have in common... They both fly, except the snake

GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

why do gingers have no friends? They are non sentient stems that are simply not capable of interacting with intellectual humans

Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

Two Guys walk into a bar; the second one should have seen it coming.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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