How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

What do you get when you cross corn with more corn? A devestating force that will make you live on a rowboat and perform demeaning puppet shows you will not Even enyoy!!!!

I can count to potato.

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

How does a black man put puzzles together? First, he locates the four corners. Next, he begins filling in the sides. Finally, he uses the picture on the box to fill in the center. It can be a very tedious process if he is not paying attention.

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

Q: What's 1 + 1? A: I don't know, I am an African who was bought up in the famine my mother died, my father starved. I have to sell myself to feed my sisters. I never went to school and drink my urine every second day because I have no water.

How do you confuse a blonde? Go up to her and say, "The bookbag coffeepotted the ice cream wedding! Is it gosling for you to rectify this pane of glass and oceans? I won't be able to berry a giant squid before the cows arrive."

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

wanna hear a joke: women's rights

Woman.

Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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