A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

a horse walks into a bar. the barman asks "why the long face". not understanding human language, the horse takes a shit, neighs then leaves

What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

What did the Elephant say the other Elephant? We do not know. Their vocalization is still a mystery to us.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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