A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Once upon a time, a story teller used the "once upon a time" metaphor in order to tell you your parents have died in a terrible accident

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An elderly man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Dad!" The old man replies, "Hi son. I'll have a Bud Light." The bartender serves his dad a Bud Light and says, "I'm thinking about going back to school to become a doctor." The old man says, "I'm an alcoholic." The bartender replies, "Great, another Bud Light coming up!"

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being dragged to his death by an 18 wheeler.

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a penis

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Terrance was going to clean his room but then he got high, do you know why? because terrance is addicted to illicit street drugs and should seek medical help.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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