roses are red violets are blue I hear a bus...

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

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A moose walks into a store and asks the lady where the potatoes are. She says "isle five". he walks to isle five and there were no potatoes

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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im black

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

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if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

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Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

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A brunette, a blond and a red-head decide to go swimming in a lake. To prepare, they go shopping together to get some new bikinis. When they get to the shop they are pleased to find that the bikinis are on sale and they get them 50% off. They drive with their new swimwear to the lake and get changed in the changing room. When they get out they notice that it is quite cold. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice that the lake is dirty. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice the lake is actually a spill of oil. They decide to go swimming anyway. They remember that none of them can swim. They decide to go swimming anyway. They jump in. They drown.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

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If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

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My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

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"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Three months to live. Three months to live who? The C-Scan showed a massive, inoperable tumor in your brain that's been developing for years. You have only three months to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops