What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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25

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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German sausage is the wurst

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Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

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Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

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What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

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you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

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What did the black man say to the man from Kyrgyzstan? I've never heard of your country before.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

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knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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