How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?!?

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

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what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

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Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

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Oh wow, I've never seen one that big before. Thats what the 12 year old boy said as he starred at the the Great Pyramid of Pharaoh Khufu.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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