Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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A plane is going to land at 3:30, if the monkey is holding a gun how does the bus driver commite suicide 12, because the laywer attacked the dyslexic man.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's coop was faulty and thus it escaped.

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Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

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What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water jack fell down and broke his neck and he was dead... The End

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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