Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Your momma so poor, she has a hard time paying her bills.

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

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Ring Ring Hello? Click

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Agent 47.

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Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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Roses are red violets are blue I don't know you so get away from me.

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Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

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bees knees

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i wish i was a tree !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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