Q: How do you fit 20 babies into a bowl? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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your life

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

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Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

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How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

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whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

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What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

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Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Hello

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get down.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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