If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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A chinchilla and an octopus walk into a bar. What do they say? The octopus says Hello but the chinchilla says nothing because chinchillas cannot talk.

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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i find your gravy quite lumpy.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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The horse's name was Friday

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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