Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

kevin kim

Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Walt dies in breaking bad.

Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hurricane Irene.

Why did Mary fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Who pushed johnny of the cliff? Certainly not Mary

What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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