when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

Why did the dog die? He was old

test test

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

Q:Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: he isn't because 6 and 7 are both concepts that cannot have fear like a living being

How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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