A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

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What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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HOLY SHIT ITS AN AIRPANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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What do you call a bunch of black people in a red car.... A jaffa

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Yo mamma so fat, she's on a diet and is losing weight at a good, steady rate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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