Q: What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he didn't make it that far

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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I'm tired.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

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I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

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Knock knock Who's There..... Guess who's coming Who's coming Me inside you !

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

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Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

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do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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