how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

Why did the chicken cross the road? This website is terrible. Are you servers from 1990? I hope you all get cancer.

Why are there no Jews in hell? Because Hitler is there,

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

Womens Rights

I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

Some guy: Which of these is not delicious,watermelon,chicken,or kool aid. Black guy: What?

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

Whats black, white, and red all over? a dead panda.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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