What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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why did the Cow die....? He didnt!!!!

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

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How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? How ever many seats happen to be available.

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Whats worse than a repeated Anti-joke This One

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Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

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Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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