Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why is the blonde so upset? Her mother is dying from cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

the guy on tv right now isnt funny. i blame canada

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

thumb_up thumb_down -23

YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's red and invisible? We don't know that it's red.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An american man, chinese man, black man, and a Mexican man walk into a bar. The american man says i want to show you guys a trick, so they go to the empire state building and the american man jumps off the side and comes back up alive. He tells them i will do it one more time, watch closely. So he jumps off and comes back alive. The american guy tells the chinese man to do it. So the chinese guy jumps off and dies. Then the american guy tells the mexican to jumps off, sonhe does it. The mexican man dies and the black guy is told to do it and he is afraid, but still does it, he dies. The american man goes back to the bar and the barkeep says "Superman you can be a real dick when your drunk!"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

thumb_up thumb_down

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops