Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

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So a disabled man walks into a bar...

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what's white and sticky? mayonnaise.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

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Kefka > Sephiroth

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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What's the difference between a mexican and a bench A bench can support a family

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A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

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Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

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Explain the term 'Standard of Living'? Not having sex with diseased and obese women.

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Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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What did john say to bob Hey bob

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Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Elephant. Elephant who? Seatbelt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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