How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Because she has down's syndrome

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

A plane filled with English tourists is on it's way from Holland to Spain. It crashes in France. Where are the surviors buried? Survivors aren't buried.

Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

why did the dog bark at the picture because it was ugly

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

What did little Jimmy get for Christmas? Presents because he wasn't poor.

Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

Want to hear a joke? So do I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...