why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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are you lazy? -yes -Why are u lazy? -cause am lazy

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

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your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Q: How did the black man die? A: He got hit by a car, and we all know that this is painful.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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A blond, a brunnet and a read head all fall off a cliif, wich one did not die They all died you idiots

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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