A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

Knock knock Who's there? Yo mamma Nobody's home, go away mom

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

A women walks into a kitchen.

Why did the man get frustrated searching through a box of forks? He was looking for a spoon.

Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

Q:So there's a black guy and a mexican sitting in a car...who's driving? A: The Cop

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

Go away.

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Vagina jokes aren't funny, period.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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