What do you call a white guy surrounded by black guys? -Steve Nash

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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give me a thumbs up

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

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Wanna hear a dead baby joke? Brittany Spears is pregnant

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Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

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His face was drawn, but the curtains were real.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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Wanna know a funny word? Pickle-weasel.

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Giving birth to the antichrist

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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Women's rights.

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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Your Mom

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What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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