What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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Gay rights.

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what do you call something that dosint exist? nothing.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Justin Bieber

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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