Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you know there is a whole country occupied with twins? It's called China

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where does lady gags buy her bran flakes ? Sainsburys

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the black kid get for christmas?? Your tv

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -10

In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says, "Boy, it sure is hot in here!" The other one replies, "OMG, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops