Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

canadians

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blind man walked past a fish store. For a second he thought it might be a womens vaginal odor, but then concluded it was most likely a fish store, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

69

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops