Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

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Knock knock. Who's there You are.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Why couldn't the ten year old watch a porno movie? Because it was on blu-ray and his family only owned a regular dvd player.

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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I can see you under there. Under what?

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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