Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Look out there's a bus in front of you

DANA

what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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