Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

thumb_up thumb_down -17

THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

THEN WHO WAS FONE?

thumb_up thumb_down

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man is balancing on a bar. But it's a bar where people drink so I don't know how that works.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are trees green? I have no idea

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops