why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

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Take wrong turns

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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what is worse than bitting into your apple and finding a worm? 9/11

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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What's worse then falling off a buliding? Falling of a higher building.

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

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Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

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A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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What was the woman doing in the kitchen? Investigating a murder..

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ROSES ARE RED WATCHES ARE GOLD GET ON YOUR KNEES AND DO WHAT YOUR TOLD

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Knock Knock. Doors open

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Doctor: I'm gunna try to fit your illness into an everyday, normal conversation. Is that okay? Patient: okay. Doctor: how are you? Patient: fine... Doctor: that's weird.. Because you have AIDS

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What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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