So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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The King stands next to a pole. The King goes away, the pole stays there.

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Choir.

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad seen that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

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What happens when you drop the soap in Prison? You pick it back up and go about your business.

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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What do you call three mexicans in a bowl of soup? Whatever their respective names might happen to be.

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what did the horse say after the man told him to have a good day? nothing, horses dont talk.(:

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Two girls are sitting quietly.

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

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Okay, an ambulance is arriving for me (cops called it whatever I am fine) If you are still reading this then get the fuck out before I fire you no more messages.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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