Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he fell off his bike.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Q:Do you know why Jesus would not be a good goalkeeper? A:Because he never played football

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Did you know that if you say "gullible" slowy, it still sounds like you're saying "gullible."

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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