A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

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Q. You know what sucks A. Being an orphan

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Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

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The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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So a man walks into a bar and says to the bartender I'll have a beer

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were all of equal intelligence.

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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10inch nice

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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