Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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Ms Leong Sux

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his 8th birthday? Prosthetic arms and legs.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? The president. -Harrison

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Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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