why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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the top 6 dictators who have died this year Moammar Gadhafi Kim Jong IL Osama bin ladden Saddam Husein Steve jobs Internet Explorer

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Black people

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

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What happens when two black people go into a store with masks on? They buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, Mitchell ate it before it could do so.

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How do you crash an airplane? By not knowing how to fly it.

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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i hate when your sentence doesn't end as you testicle.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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