A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

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How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

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A jew walks into an Oven....

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your carmel apple, which costs about 35 cents more on average.

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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Penis

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Jews

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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What is a vampire's favourite dessert? Vampires aren't real.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Boom! Splat! You'll never know.

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Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. God does not answer.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? They both live underground. Apart from the Eagle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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