Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A woman gets in her car to drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does an eagle and a worm have in common? They both live in the ground. Except the eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?!?!?!?! Oh, well then nevermind

thumb_up thumb_down

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you pleasure your grandmother? Ask your brother

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock Who is there? Your mom Your mom who? STOP WITH THIS GAME AND JUST OPEN THE DOOR!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops