What did the father tell his son who was caught stealing from the teacher? --The father didn't say anything because he walked out on his family when the children were born.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A man held him at gunpoint and threatened to kill his entire family.

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I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

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Whats 9 + 10 19

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the little boy? May God be with you.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops