What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what's funnier than hell? heaven

thumb_up thumb_down -57

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a dog without a bone? Floppy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What turns red and explodes in a microwave A cat

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

thumb_up thumb_down -5

sixty....eight.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My wife crashed the car while listening to Adele last night. She ended up rolling in the jeep.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"i see", said the blind man ... ...to his deaf wife... ...while his crippled children jumped for joy....

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why didn't andrea clean the dishes? She had no hands

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops