What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

What is yellow, smooth, and dangerous? Shark-infested custard

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

Who did the man call when his house was on fire? He called his mother as the firefighters put out the fire.

A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

why did the black guy win a gold medal in the olympics? hard work, dedication and determanation! what no one else can be bothered to do anymore because of all this new technology and stuff!! get of your arse and do something active. NOW!

What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

What do you call a man who has no heart? Dead

Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

Why did Tiger look in the toilet? It doesn't matter, he didn't find anything.

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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