Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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-Knock Knock -Come in!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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What;s worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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