Asshole huh? Dont give me any ideas. Again you are not high on weed are you? Then that's really bad.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

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Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

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A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

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What is the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? A dolphin is not a ghost

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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GINGER PEOPLE

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?? Where's my tractor?

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Asians look like they have down syndrome.

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What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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