how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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What's the number 1 tip to burning stomach fat? Lighting yourself on fire.

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Zach Barlow

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What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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your father died

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What's weirder than an asian? His dinner

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Chuck Norris died.

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Q:Why did the black man break into the KFC? A: Due to being recently fired from his job, he is not earning any income. The lack of money to support his family of 5 drove him to such a desperate state that he found breaking into restaurant the only way to provide for his loved ones.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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