What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

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What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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What do you call your mum without an umbrella? Saturated Fat

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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how do you kill a Jewish person? you don't that just fucking mean!

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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Pineapple.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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What did the heroin addict get for Christmas? Aids from a used needle.

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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I love pissing people off :P

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what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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Which is correct grammar: 'I hasn't a penis got' or 'I doesn't a penis has'? Answer: They're both wrong.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

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Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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