A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Adele walks into the stables

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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women's rights.

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Why did the mexican jump when he heard police sirens? The sirens where very lound and abrupt. Therefore startling this mexican man.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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A man with short term memory loss loses his memory every day. His last memory before his accident is the day he escaped this hostpital and murdered a family of five. He continues to do this every day and he is known in Mexico as cincochico.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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What did johnny say when he fell down the stairs? Nothing he snapped his neck

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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