A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

ur dug has tits <3 from Alec Bamford xxxxxxxx<3<3<3xxxxxx QAHS 4life

your mom is so fat, shes not skinny

Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

If Michael Jackson were alive today, what would he be doing? Scratching at the top of his coffin.

Why can't Kim and Arnold get childern ? because they are 2 stones.

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

boobies oh boobies i how i love u boobies the are so juicy with milk and hairy with in the tities

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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