A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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A Jew, Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have fun there a good time and then they go home.

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NEVER

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so...um, yeah

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

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What do you call it when Chuck Norris gambles? Chuck Norris does not gamble. That would imply the chance of losing.

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What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

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Why was the blonde sad? Her phone was broken due to an NNEMP.

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You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

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Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

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Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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Why is Lewis hayphore gay Answer = because he sucked hos brother off #Cameron Hayphore

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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