why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

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Your mom.

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Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

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facebook is like a refrigerator. you eat it.

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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If you were a Transformer, you would be Optimus Fine.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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What's funnier than poop? More poop

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Your mom is so stupoid she put a piece of paper on the TV and called it paper view!

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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balls

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knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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Q: What's bigger than a volcano? A: Earth

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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