In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the Asian woman get into a car accident? She didn't pay attention in driver school and sped through a red light and hit a bus that killed 14 children.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the cow lay down? Because he was tired

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

1)Where do you find a turtle with no legs? 2)Where? 1)Where you left it. 1)... Knock Knock... 2)Who's there? 1)...Not the turtle...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shrubs are red, Trees are red, Holy shit my garden's on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -14

America needs to burn Less fossil fuels to save the environment

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops