How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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sharks

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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No.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops