What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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So a chef, a soldier, and a lawyer are riding in a plane. The pilot has a heart attack and they all die.

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Have you heard the one about the three tailed salamander that fell off a bridge? I haven't either.

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Why couldn't the Indian kid read? He got shot in the eye.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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My children are mistakes

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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i lyk 2 eet pup

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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