What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a B**ch.

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A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? In a desperate, but unsuccessful attempt to save his mothers life, as a serial killer pulled her into his van

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Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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How do you fit 100 jews in a car? It wouldn't work.. Nevermind.

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What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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