Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the depressed girl say to her mother? I cut my wrists

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

thumb_up thumb_down -3

your mother is so lesbian

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man stuck his diick in a blender He had a "penis shake" for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Snooki

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the wife get her husband after he became a paraplegic in a car accident? Divorce papers.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops