If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

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whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

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CHICKEN it is a chickenly chickeny food we eat WRONG

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

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Why did the bones cross the road? They didn't, the dogs ate them.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

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Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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Not gonna tell you, that was one weird story, I feel like super high right now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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