LIKE THIS!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An Irish man walks out of a bar..... 'nuff said

thumb_up thumb_down +28

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the beautiful woman marry the ugly poor old man? She was blonde & was therefor not aware that he wasn't rich nor younge.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call two black men and a hispanic man in the back of a car? The punchline of this joke is offensive, and might bring legal troubles to Anti-Joke.Com and it's subsidiaries. For these reasons, Anti-Joke.Com will not allow it to be shown.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what does a granny look best in? 1950

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +8

YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.. A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -2

BIG PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops