Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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Whats better at driving? A pig or a chicken. Neither because they are animals and it is impossible for the to even posses the power of controlling a moving vehicle.

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- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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What's black, white and red all over? A dead panda

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well no one really knows for sure

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Whats worse than having sex with your hot cousin? Not having sex with your hot cousin...

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where do you find sunglasses at? the store

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Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

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whats the king of the forest, is the color brown and is red all over? A deer or someone's soon to be dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side . Unfortunately , there was a car accident and shrapnel from the explosion [caused by gas on fire] cut his head off causing the old woman to faint , and later die a horrible death .

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Why did the boy fall out of his high chair? I'm not sure.

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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WE BE-ETH YON KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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