Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

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What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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Why is Adam saying numbers? He is a maths teacher.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

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How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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Your mom is so stupid, she thought the square root of pie was 3.14156

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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If life throws you melons... ouch

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Brians mother always told him to reach for the stars. He died the next morning.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

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If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

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Three guys are in the desert. They find a lamp, they rub it, and a genie appears. The genie says "I'll grant each of you a wish." So the first guy says "I want to return to my family in my native country." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The second guy says "I want to live in Hollywood, be famous and rich, and have dozens of girls around me." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The third guy says "I want to go to Hawaii." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. So all three guys end up being happy.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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