A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

What is Megan Fox's middle name? Denise

A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

what did hulk say when he was mad? im mad

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

She said no

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Vagina-Boob

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

Q: What's worse than finding 1 worm in your apple? A: Finding 2 worms in your apple Q: What's worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? A: The Holocaust Q: What's worse than the Holocaust? A: Finding 3 worms in your apple!

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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