Why didn't the gangster cross the road? Because he J-walked and was hit by a car.

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

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Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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I saw 2 cannibals eating a clown. What did I do? Called the local police.

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

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Goat balls.

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Yo mama's so old, she might die soon

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What happens when you cross a housecat with a feral cat? A kitten is born.

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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Penis.

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What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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