What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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your mom

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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why did the girl cross the road? to commit suicide

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squirrels playing in the street=dez bryant playing tennis

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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How did the boy fly? he had wings.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

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Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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Take part of what?

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if Ruddell was gay what would he be? A gay prick!

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Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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