come along children

A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants. What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming wearing a pair of sunglasses? Like wearing a pair of sunglasses as a dhitty disguise would confuse me. I took law at UCLA before becoming a professional game hunter and I've been in this business for almost 10 years. I think I know an elephant with or without sunglasses.

what is very tall and red a very tall red building

why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

Once upon a cross

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

A black man is pulled over doing 66 in a 65 zone. He asks the officer what the problem is and the officer says his left tail light is out

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

i like it in the mouth

Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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