roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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"Knock Knock" "Come in"

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French people

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPFTeHEsAS4 You will not be disappointed.

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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bologna

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A kangeroo is stuck in a tree with no headlights, how many waffles does it take to get to the moon? NO, silly. Snakes don't have armpits.

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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How did sarah break her arm? She was in a tragic car accident. An ambulance arrived and quickly rushed her to the hospital where she was cared for by medical professionals.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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Why did the black man skip every other step on the stairs? Because he had long legs and it was faster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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