Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor dog

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

What's the difference between a horse and a chicken? They're different species and also the chicken is female, while the horse I was referring to is male.

Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

What's green and has four wheels? A dolphin. I lied about it having four wheels. I lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.

YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...