What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

What did the man say before he killed himself? I am going to kill myself

What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

British Dentistry

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

Did you know? . You already know!

Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

roses are red vioets are blue i have chlamydia now so do you....

An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

Vagina-Boob

roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Living through the Holocaust and finding a time machine to take you back to the beginning of it again.

How do u kill a mocking bird? Stab it

Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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