How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

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Q: why did the boy walk into the woods alone? A: nobody knows he hasn't come out yet

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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9

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What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Q:What's better than getting 500 million dollars A:Nothing

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David Cameron

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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Republicans

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

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What did the priest say to the Atheist when he walked into the church? How are you?

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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