A British man walks into a dental office.

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Neglegence and irresponsibility of a farmer.

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

What do you call 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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