What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

jacob mckeand sucks his own dick, lol jokes, he has jamie for that

How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

Romney 2012

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

Why Was 6 Afraid of 7? Because 7 was a Pedophile

What do you call batman when we lost all his money? Broke

Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

Gawds Trololols: Jewsus: I die for ur Sins, now u are free! *argh* Gawd AD 3000: TIME TO DIE SINNERS! Jewsus: But I paid for humanity`s sins and am stuck in hell because of this and... Gawd: Meh just didnt really liek you TROLOLOL! Gawds Trololols 2 directors clit: Gawd: Jebus! (the third) I want you to trololol peeps now! GO! Jebus: As you see people, I have died for you in order to prove that I am immortal! Peeps: Uh, wow? Jebus: TROLOLOL! So dad, when am I gonna get back to earth again, I kinda promised my boyfriends/apostles that there would be a second cumming as you told me to do, and people have been waiting for over twothousand and fourtee... Gawd: Never! Trolololol! Moral: "Would you trust a being whose veins are loaded with alcohol?" Jesus 2: The second coming: In cincemas never!

Knock knock, come in.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

Why did the black man buy a gun? because he wanted to go hunting.

Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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