Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

What is yellow, and cannot swim? A School Bus.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

WUT SMELLS ? my poo

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

how do you know Newcastle are losing? its 5 past 3

Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first polar bear says, "Pass the soap." The second polar bear replies, "No soap, radio." OMG YOU DON'T GET IT?!?!?!?! NOOB

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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