Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

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What sound did the man make? Splatt. He fell off a building.

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Whats the next Line? YAH YAH YAH YAH YAH....

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I woke up today

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

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Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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what does rhinoceros and tomato have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops