What's funnier than poop? More poop

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two people walk into Israel. The first is shot on the spot. The second screams "I only have two pennies in my pocket!" Immediately he is raped by five Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Eh yo Sean u mr. Kingston Hey, how are you doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

your father died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the mushroom jock say to the mushroom nerd? your and ugly wimpy mushroom....and i am on steroids

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops