Roses are red Violets are blue I'm ovulating

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

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Even better if I am not here in an hour, lets make it two huh?, I was thinking about you, sleep is well, not something I prioritize well enough at all, probably why I am so adrenaline crazy.

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What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being chased by a wolf, who promptly ate the chicken when they arrived at the other side.

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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Josh brown loves Jessica Potts from Dylan xoxo

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What is the quickest way to a mans heart? Through his chest with a stick.

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper painted red.

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Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

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Toaster

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I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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