Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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BenWuzHear

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

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There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty one year olds? The orgasm.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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hi hey i hate you why you ate my mother she tasted good i like fried chicken ITS A SMALL WORLD! SO DO I well lets go to the beach ok

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

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Jack and jill Went up the hill To go smoke Some marijuana Jack got high Unzipped his fly And asked jill "Do you wanna?" Jill sais "yes" Pulled up her dress And things got real fun But silly jill Forgot the pill And now they have a son

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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What did the man say to the homeless child. Where's you parents?

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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