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What did the mexican fireman call his twin sons? nothing. they were stillborn

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

what did the terorist do when he went out side blew up

the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

Q: Why did the Klansman go up to acclaimed rapper and television star, Flavor Flav, and say "Do you know what time it is, boy?" A: Because his trademark "bling" seems to be an actual functioning time piece. Q2: Why did that same Klansmen brutally murder Flavor Flav after he learned it was 5:46 in the pm? A2: Becasue Flavor Flav is black and that's kinda what you're expected to do in the Klan...

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

what do you call a black man in prison? justice.

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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