If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

A genie came out of a lamp explain?

"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

How's your mum? she's dead..

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

A hemophiliac walks into a bar. Then he dies of internal bleeding.

Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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