What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

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I got a new jacket. The jacket had real cotton inside the sleeves. The next day my new jacket was gone, but the one i bought yesterday wasn't.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was lying about the wheels.

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

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Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because she was dead.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampon? A tampon doesn't cry when it's hungry or tired.

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I like to slap biitches, I like to slap hoes

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Y' can't spell rape without ape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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what do you call a man that just got brutally murdered? i don't know, check his birth certificate.

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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What's wrong the a man who can't tell where he is, can't tell where he's going, and doesn't know how to use a map? Downs Syndrome

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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