A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

A guy walks into a bar. He goes to the hospital with a severe head injury and dies.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

Why did the banana rot? Because it didn't have any gills.

Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

What do you say to a woman in the kitchen? Cook me some food.

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

A Priest and A Rabbi Walk Into The Bar. Ouch.

Q: Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: She had no arms... Q: Knock Knock! Q: Who's there? A: NOT SARA! --- Q: Okay... What song does Sara sing to her arms? A: Somebody That I Used To Know... --- Now. If you're happy and you know it clap your... nevermind O_O

Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

equality for women

What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

why was 6 afraid of 9? cause thats just gross.

Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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