How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

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What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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Who is John Galt?

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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haha

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Why was the boy crying. He just got raped by a llama

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A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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