Paige

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

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What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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knock knock!? . . No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

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What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

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Guess what? That is actually a ridiculously broad question, and I can be referring to anything. You really have no chance in guessing "what" is. As a matter of fact, I can just be thinking about a thought of something else, which is not even a concrete thing. Therefore, you really have no chance of guessing what "what" actually is. So I win. You lose.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

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Jews.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Drumset.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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