A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

"You two form fours while I get the other one"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Violets are blue I had sex with your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the man say when he lost his keys? "Where's my keys?!"

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops