why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

When there's something weird in your neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

BenWuzHear

Why do i have no likes? Because im disliked...

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

If an ear could talk what would it say? Probably nothing because it doesn't have a tongue...

What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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