Reminds me of when I was a teen, I was working at an elderly home, and there was this really really old woman, and she was leaning forward towards me on her wheelchair, one of her hands accidentally near my crotch, I mean this granny was really senile and shit. Then she went all like, you really like it when I touch you there don't you? I mean it was not the best nor the fastest one, but all that excitement "OMG WHAT IF I GET CAUGHT BY A COLLEAGUE WHILE A 89 YEAR OLD WAS JACKING ME OFF!" Really made it all special folks... Especially when I got caught, it was like OMG STRESS ORGASM HOLY DONT CUM NOOOAAAARGHHHH!!!!!! WOHOOOOOO! I walked outta there like a champ, I was like 18 and my girlfriend/colleague which caught me was like, 27, and the next week she was 32, and before you know it, she was 46 on facebook... Thats like you know... Too old or something...

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why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

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What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Animal control.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

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Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

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Please ignore this statement.

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

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What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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how do kill a black guy? shoot him in the face

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Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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What do you do when a black man points a gun at your face? you do what he tells you to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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