What do you call a black man with a well paid job? A sucess and a credit to himself and his family

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? None of them. He can't read.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Our societal waste doesn't deserve to be called a group. They fail to organize themselves and lack the intelligence to support themselves. Let's call them a collective. Similar to dust, or smarter than them, bacteria.

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Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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A guy jumps off a cliff and does a reasonable thing, scream to his death.

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Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

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Joe used to always talk about his family and his two wonderful kids Joe can no longer talk to or about his family because his smoking habits have gotten out of control

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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Two gorillas walked into a bar and it hurt

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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