what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

I'd like to make a withdraw

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

Ring Ring Hello? Click

How many retards does it take to change a lightbulb?? None it is physically impossible

Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

david give me my money back... i will have it next week

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

What's long, hard, and full of seamen... A Submarine

Help I'm being raped!

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is dead. What's worse that that? It's eating it's way out. What's worse than that? It made it. What's worse than that? It went back in for 2nd's.

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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