What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

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What do you call a blonde who likes to read? A bookworm.

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pull my finger (farts)

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What do you say to a rock? Meow

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

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wots brown and smells like shite shite

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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Top Gear USA

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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WHAT????

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Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

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He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

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What has two heads and one body Conjoined twins

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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Why can't Helen Keller hear or talk straight? Because she's dead

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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?J?o?k?e?

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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