What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

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A Priest, A Rabbi, and an Imam walk into a bar. They promptly sit down and have a friendly theological discussion.

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what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

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An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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Why is jordan goldstein a fag cause he doesnt like my videos

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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