What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

Take off your shoes.

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

Guess what? You guessed it.

What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill? Look there's 100 elephants coming over the hill What did tarzan say when he saw 100 elephants coming over the hill with sunglasses on? Nothing he did not recognize them

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

Ask your friend: Will you remember me in a week? Will you remember me in a month? Will you remember me in a year? Knock Knock. Who's there? How did you forget me already?!?

What do you call a bird that can't fly? A dead bird

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Nothing. His parents are dead and Santa doesn't exist.

Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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