Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

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whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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mark is life

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because there were no cars coming

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What has two wheels, two arms, and a head? A man in a wheelchair. Why was he in a wheelchair? He stepped on a landmine. A man walks, I'm sorry rolled, into a bar.

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What did Billy get for christmas? Nothing he died of lung cancer.

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

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roses are red violets are blue no one likes raisen bran except your mom

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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One day, a Hippo was riding a scooter and an ant was sitting on the back seat. Suddenly they meet with an accident. They both fall from the scooter on their heads but only the hippo gets hurt. How??? Because the ant was wearing a helmet.

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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Yeah, I never intended to keep that a secret. What is autocast?

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Knock Knock Dude i am not going to answer the door

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Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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