How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

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What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops