Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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Barbara Streisand

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why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

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what sad about 4 mexican dieing in a car crash??? My car

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If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? It is an assessment intended to measure the respondents' knowledge or other abilities.

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how long has dibey got left like :)

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

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Q: What happened to the 16 year old pregnant black woman? A: She gave birth to a baby in 9 months.

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What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

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What starts with an N, ends with R, and you arent supposed to say? Never

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why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

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two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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