A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Whats the worst part of having a Birthday on Feb. 29th? You only get facebook birthday wishes every 4 years.

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

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viki has 10 penises around her she eats 8 of them what does viki have? viki has AIDS

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YOU

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Why was 8 afraid of 9? Because 9 bullied him until he became anorexic.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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I read the terms of service.

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What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Q: What do the Gynecologist and the pizza delivery man have in common? A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

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What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

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What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

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I am a joke. I am funny.

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What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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