What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A rabbit hops into a bar and sits on a stool, he then asks for a carrot, the barman didn't have a clue what he said because it was a rabbit so gives him a carrot to be generous. The bar door slams open and animal control put him in a cage and take him away. The moral of the story is that you should never let rabbits in your bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mother is so fat. We are all extremely concerned for her health.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How old is victor? Half past dead

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Fine, ladies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

thumb_up thumb_down +14

jacob mckeand sucks his own dick, lol jokes, he has jamie for that

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two men walk into a bar. You would think at least one of them would've seen it.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops