I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

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Q: Why did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

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If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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What is black, white, and red all over? A bleeding zebra.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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"Have you heard the one about the trannie?" "No, what is it?" "Wow, that's offensive." -Juanita

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Why was the butcher bald? He was undergoing intensive chemotherapy.

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

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What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

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Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A white boy who just got jumped, with sever bruises left lying in a pool of his own blood.

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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