What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your limbs scliced off with a chainsaw and being put in a cage to get mauled by a Mutant Man-eating horse.

I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

One time I walked into a fat kid..

Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

Why did the little boy cry and run home from the store? Because the store was out of pickles.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

24

Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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