Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

Are you still trying to turn me on or something? Well its not not working. Anyway, what is yogurt? So I am eating dead bacteria here? Ifs so strange I feel like I have known you my entire life.

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven shot up his school and ate nine kids. Also before he was arrested he told six he was going to blow his brains out. Then he murdered the police and has been on the run ever since.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

Homework.

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Compton

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

penis

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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