Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guys ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why is this anti-joke here? Because someone submitted it to this website.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't the orphan play baseball? He can't find home.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -18

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a pile of bricks and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of bricks in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops