What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

We are sorry for being so sorry, and apologize again for apologizing so much... Why wont you just let me apologize? Does this insult you? I apologize. HEY! STOP THAT! I SAID I WAS SORRY SORRY FOR BEING SORRY! FORGIVE ME PLEASE SORRY WHY ARE YOU DRAWING THAT KNIFE OUT OF THE... LISTEN I AM SORRY!!! From my book the boy that cried help too much: The help arrived and the boy was never seen again. TRIPLE POST TO SAY SORRY FOR DOUBLE POSTING! QUADRUPLE POST TO SAY SORRY FOR DOUBLE POSTING...ETC.

A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

why are black people good at basketball cuz their tall

Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

What's ripe and orange? A ripe orange.

What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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