Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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What happens if a guy is gay? You call him Verl.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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How do you make Sasuke cry? Kill his family

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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matt shut up

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How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A man walks into a bar The bartender asks: What would you like to drink?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My wife just died from pancreatic cancer."

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

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A British man walks into a dentist's office.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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