What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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Roses r red violets r blu I hav5 fingers the middle ones for u

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bob saget

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How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

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two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

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A blonde and a brunette are falling from a cliff. They are going to die.

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What is shaped like a duck without a beak? A duck that I punch the beak off of.

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why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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What's the difference between an Asian driver and a Belgian prostitute? Nothing at all: Marie-Edith Yang is proud of her mixed heritage, and earns a decent wage in a relatively clean brothel in the lovely little medieval town of Bruges.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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I've got a boner

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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The Christian Bible.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

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A man spills his his drink. Like any other man would do, he got some paper towels and some mult-purpose cleaner and proceeded to wipe up the mess. Not a further word was said about the situation.

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Soccer...

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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