What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Why did the mexican order a bean burrito? Because thats his favorite

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

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25

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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asdf

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What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

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A black guy goes to the bar. The Barman say: What would you like to drink?

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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Stealth baseballs record

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How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

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A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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What is yellow and can shot? A Banon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops