What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Hey i just met you. and this is crazy. I sent you my pubes in an envelope.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

666

Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

I'm not wearing underwear. Why? Because I have built in underwear. :)

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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