Knock, Knock. Who's there? No reply cause Kyle got knocked out by the door.

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

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one morning i turned on my tv

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Depends. Some are vegetarians or vegans, while most eat a mixture of vegetables and meat.

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A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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