What the difference between a mexican family and a bench? The bench can support the family

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Two black guys jump off of a building; who falls first? The one that jumped first

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Knock Knock Come in, the door's open.

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Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

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A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

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What's brown, smells like shit, and are annoying as hell? Taking shits

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How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

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Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

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If life throws you melons, not only might you be dyslexic, but you are probably also uneducated, since the phrase is "if life gives you lemons".

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Why did the boy die? He had cancer.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue This poem makes no sense Trampoline

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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What do you call a special Ed walrus? Anorexic pony ???? Discovering that a convicted sex offenderi is living nearby stirs up a range of feelings: fear, anger, insecurity and anxiety. There are many things you can do to make the situation more manageable - and channel these emotions into actions that address situations that put children most at risk for sexual harm. Learn how to identify the most common threats and concerns. Then find out the best ways you can join with others to keep everyone safe. Take action! Learn how to keep children safe Get the FAQs about the sex offender registryi Download our Tip Sheet:  Concerned about Sex Offenders in Your Neighborhood?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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Why did the lightbulb cross the road? It must have had an external force acting upon it. Lightbulbs are inanimate objects and cannot make decisions or move voluntarily. Someone must have thrown it. It broke. Someone should clean it up.

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hey

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Having lost his job, wife, and general sanity, he resorted to suicide by car accident.

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A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops