What do you get when do you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence.

Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

Person 1: Can I write a good anti-joke? Person 2: No. Person 1: Why nut? Person 2: All the gud onez r taken. ;-; tru...

What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

Why do black guys have white palms? Because that area of the human hand contains no melanocytes, the cells that allow pigment to form.

Q: Why did the boy go to the orphanage? A: His parents were dead.

What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

Why did the boy go to the CONCENTRATION camp. He was a Jew

What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

Neither have I, nobody knew him.

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

Why don't you ever stick your hand into the bottom of the jelly bean jar? Cuz' the black ones will steal your watch

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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Roses are red Violets are blue I shit my pants do you want my poo.

A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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