Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? No Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I just can't stand sitting down!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The Barackness Monster

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +25

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -3

223

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did Suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.... well then knock knock! whis there? suzie. suzie who? she doesnt know either...she has no arms!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life" life sentence: a prison term lasting as long as the prisoner lives; "he got life for killing the guard"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops