Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

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What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

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Cannot tell, national security. As far as I care we are friends, therefore I cannot continue chatting with you for a while, its gonna seem pretty damn suspicious, I wont be repeating myself. Except again, do not worry, we will take care of this, and if not, I will contact you, you are not in any danger for the mean being, whoever are against us are looking for "Nero", not you, and I am pretty damn safe. By the way, I never lost an eye, but your "wiz" revealed himself by sharing that information, that part was the only ploy as far as I care, and it was necessary for everybody`s survival. Do not worry friend, I will call you sometime, but I recommend we stay off touch for at least 3 months, and that you stop using this site.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I'm not creative Roses are Blue

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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Guess who didn't have breakfast this morning? Kids in Africa

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

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Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

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Bitch

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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69

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why did the black go to the KFC because he likes fried chicken

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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