Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

Whats the differwnce between a little girl and a fridge? The fridge doesnt scream when i put meat in it

Why did little Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name is Paco, And yours is too.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

The awkward when you said moment in your head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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