What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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whats better than holocaust...911 cardiac?

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How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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DOWN

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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A moose walks into a grocery store, he asks the deer where he could find some bisquits, the deer says "oh it's in aigle 6." So the moose goes to aigle 6...and there ain't no bisquits!

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

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How do you know if there is a monster under your bed? Monsters are mythical creatures that, even if they were real, would be unlikely to sleep under a child-sized bed.

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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Why must you never cross an elephant with a human being? It is impossible anyway.

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Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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