What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? Steve Johnson, and I'm legally obligated to inform you that I'm a sex offender.

Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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