two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

3 Jews walk into a bar. Few minutes later a penny is dropped. This resenct occation causes a bar fight to brake out.

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

Knock, Knock Who's There

A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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