A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

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When is a door not a door? When its ajar.

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Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Dylan is gay

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Your mama is so fat that when she walks her legs rub against each other

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Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Me, myself, and I walked into a bar. We didn't say anything to each other because I'm not schetsophrenic.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she believes in God. While her faith has absolutely nothing to do with her intelligence and in 2014 only the most bigoted and stupid people would demean people based on their religion,she does have an IQ of 65 and is therefore believed to be mentally inadequate. It's really quite sad.

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Where did the watch-dog take the blind man on Saturday afternoon? Wherever the blind man wanted to go

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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So dont touch it

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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