What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A 14 year girl enjoys exploring the sexual regions of her body, whilst having one of her intimate sessions her brother walks into her room. Her brother was a rather sexual 17 year old, who has had sex with several different girls, and is not afraid to try new things. the brother says " get a room to his sister... oh wait" and walks out

thumb_up thumb_down -6

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walked into a bar. Ow!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the Old man die? He died of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

One guy asks another guy, "Why did the sleeping man get sucked into the sinkhole?" The other guy replies, "I don't know, I heard about that a few months ago, it seems highly improbable statistically. "

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what do you call a gay guy? kevin

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Tom: So I heard a pretty good Anti-Joke the other day. Jim: Oh, I love those!! What was it? Tom: [says nothing]

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

thumb_up thumb_down -10

did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Religion

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does little Tommy and a tomato have in common? They are both vegetables. Oh wait, a tomato is a fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops