What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

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A black man, a Muslim man, and a Jewish man walk into a bar so the bartender says, "Get the f*** out."

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Your mums a penis joke.

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Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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How many walls can you paint with a baby? Depends on how hard you throw it.

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What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

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Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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Yo momma's so fat, however, she takes pride in her size because every body is beautiful.

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Why is Justin Biber so white? there's nothing in the closet.

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Why did Colussi miss 2 years of school? -Because he died

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So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

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What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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