What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

Whats green and tasty? Snot

Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

Kid: knock knock Orphan: whos there? Kid: not your parents

What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

What should you do if you are being chased by a black man. keep running and if he tag's you, then you should try tag him back since this is a simple game of tag.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Why did the man destroy his piano? He may have been frustrated with himself for making mistakes during practice.

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

What's the difference between an Asian bookkeeper and a Jewish dog? This isn't a joke, it's an assignment for school, I need to write a 3 page paper on this. Any ideas?

Why did YUR MOM cross the road? To go slap her annoying-ass twelve year old for using "your mom" as an insult.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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