Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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How do u know that your obese ? People stare at you

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ANTONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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Why did the cat bite its owner? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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Womens Rights.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

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Buzi vagy!

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Knock Knock Who's there? I am I am who? I am here to see you

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What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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