How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

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Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

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Aww good to see you looking positive! He said to the boy dying of HIV

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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When I was just a little kid, my daddy lest the house and we all joined him to wherever he wanted to live.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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meatspin.fr

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What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

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Your Mama is so fat, when she jumped on the couch, she broke the couch.

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If life gives you lemons, keep them because hey, free lemons

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What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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