- Anti Joke

Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

what did the shark do when he died.....

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................a gay baby was just born.

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

What's worse than finding a bug in your soup? The Holocaust

YOLO

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What can a bench do, that a south African man cant? Support a family. (I HOPE THAT WASN'T RACIST)

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

Scott

What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

Punch line.

Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

What did the duck with one leg say to the pirate? Woof.

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

Ask me if i am a tree are you a tree? no

Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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