how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

ure mama's so fat

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Tell her something that doesn't make any sense at all.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black and hangs from trees? Tire swings

thumb_up thumb_down -40

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

thumb_up thumb_down -82

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

thumb_up thumb_down -10

my egg roll

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the boy fall out of his high chair? I'm not sure.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

thumb_up thumb_down +10

4-4-2

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops