The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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a man walks into a bar he got hurt

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Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

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How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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A midget walked under a bar.

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KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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