What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

What do you call a pencil that's been broken in half? 2 pencils

I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

You know George Washington? He died.

"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

Women's rights.

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

women outside of the kitchen

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

Sharks have teeth, I have teeth, Therefore i am a cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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