Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do I hate food? I don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A blonde walks into a hairdressers salon. She gets her hair cut.

thumb_up thumb_down +445

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Many pirates were illiterate and so did not know any letters, much less have a favorite. However, even if this pirate were able to read, it is unlikely that we would be able to find out his favorite letter without asking him, since pirates were primarily in existence two to four centuries ago. In addition, most people don't have a favorite letter, and so a pirate would probably not be an exception.

thumb_up thumb_down +607

Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? One is a tasty Italian food the other is a respected member of society

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama so dumb, she studied for a blood test.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the bear say to the fish? Nothing he eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does a chicken get for Christmas? A trip to the processing plant.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red That much is true But violets are purple Not freaking blue

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops