How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

You hear a big Boom, and run in, and see a shattered toilet, and a very BIG dying woman, on the floor next to it.

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

jamie looks at jacob for arousment. jacob looks at his dog.........

a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

What's the difference between a black male and a white female? There are many differences but all of which are wrong to make a joke about.

Your mumma is so stupid her IQ is 40.

Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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