What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

Did you hear about the boy with the treehouse? He caught his mom cheating on his dad in there.

read me write me

What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

What is black and white and can't fit through a revolving door? A nun with a harpoon through her back.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

potato farming

Whats a movie? A moving picture.

mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

Why did the fat prick post on the internet? Because he was MorningAfterBoy

Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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