Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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Q. What is the answer to life? A. 34

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Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

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What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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okay so theres this guy.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? nothing cows cant talk. They did however, exchange glances while chewing grass next to each other.

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what did the dead woman say the boy? I am dead.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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69

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

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I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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Woman's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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