I Love Hitler.

Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

A man walks into a bar. He is then rushed to the emergency room for severe blunt force trauma to the head and multiple cranial fractures. After years of mental therapy the man re-gains full cerebral capabilities and is extremely cautious to keep an eye out for potentially dangerous bars that present a threat to his fragile reconstructed skull.

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

33

On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

what did the blind man say as he past the fish market? he asked one of the fisherman if they had any fresh catch that day and bout three tuna steaks for his wife and son

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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