Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

Granny porn!

If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

Black Person Eating Fried Chicken

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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