What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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what's one thing we're all tired of but they still make? Those crappy love songs.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

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What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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Whats white and sticky fluff

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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Q: How do you keep a carnival fish for more than a week? A: Place it in formaldehyde when you get home

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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Surprise mother father (A+)

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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