There are 5 men in a desert a black man a white man a gay a lesbian and a white woman they have no food or water and haven't had any in 3 weeks civilization is 1 mile away how many people live and which ones They all die you can only live 3 days without water.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Knock knock Come in!

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

Womens rights.

Why did Edna fall off a cliff? Edna is blind, and so lacks the visual perception and spatial awareness of other hillwalkers.

What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

Why did the Nazi shoot the Jew in the head? Because he was a Jew. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there?" A: Knock knock knock B: "Who's there!?" A: Knock knock knock B: "God dammit who's there!?" A: "Penny?"

Oliver's friends

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

this is not a joke.

A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

There was a dog walking down the street with his GF. The dog can have a GF and can talk because this is an anti joke. Then the dog broke up with his GF because he was unhappy with her scent. Dogs are weird that way. Then, sobbing, he saw something through the blur of his tears. The county fair was open! Elated, the dog ran to the fair and waited n the ticket line for a long time. He waited so long, he almost exploded. Once he got to the end, he reached in his coat pocket (yeah, the dog is wearing a coat. It's cold), and found no wallet. FUUUUUUU! By the time he got back, the fair was closed for the day. The next time he came back, he had a hard time getting through the line. When he did, he raced to the ferris wheel. Halfway up, the ferris wheel stopped. CWAP! The neckst daey, thee dwawg whent two the ferries weele and went up. Yay. At the top, he saw his house! there was a chicken crossing the road. WTF? Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. Phuck yeah.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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