What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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A man walks into a bar and sees an attractive blonde. He is afraid of talking to her so he goes home and masterbates himself to sleep.

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sorry son your nanas been put down

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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What do you call white trash Garbage

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What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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If one of us goes, all of us go. If we all go, none of us are left out.

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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What's worse than a snake in your boot. A boot in your snake.

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I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops