1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

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roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

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What was everyone doing in the library? Reading

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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why couldnt the kid get off the couch when his mom asked him to? he was paralyzed

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

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You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

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¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

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cool

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Why did the fish fly It didn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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