Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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whats purple and savage? Barney!

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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What's worse then breaking your xbox? Going on a 24 kill streak and having itchy balls.

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You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

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Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

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Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted of in space.

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what do fish smoke? sea weed

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Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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