A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

What stops a train? A missile

Roses are red And heres something new Violets are violet They're not friggin blue

whos got a massive fukkinn melon...B.I.M

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long

Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? It isn't numbers are not sentiment objects therefore incapable of feeling fear

What happened to the asian when he took viagra? He got an erection.

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

Knock, Knock Who's There

Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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