When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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How do you kill a 1000 Ethiopians? Throw a biscuit off a cliff. JimBoto

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You are driving a bus. At the first stop, 12 people get on and 7 get off At the second stop, 13 people get on and 11 get off At the third stop, 7 people get off the bus. You turn the bus off get out and go home.

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Why was the black man at the back of the bus... Cause all the other seats were taken

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What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

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What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

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People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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