Q: What did the bartender say to the Arab as he was walking in? A: Nothing, the bomb had already killed them both.

What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

Women rights.

Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

What happened when the teacher told the class to be quite? The class was quite.

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch a pail of water Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill called the paramedics

What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

You remind me of something. What? Summer Why because I'm hot? no because there is no class..

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

I'm Coming

fabien

Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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