My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Asian NASCAR.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

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What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

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Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

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What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

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Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops