Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

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Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

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What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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