Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

How do you stop a lawn mower? You throw a baby under it.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

why didnt the girl laugh at the joke? because it wasnt funny

You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

What did the little boy order at Burger King? He ordered a burger and wiped his booger on the counter.

my captcha says : forkin chickens

Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

The adventures of Helen Keller:

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. That always nice, you dont want your dairy products to spoil.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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