I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

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Boner

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What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

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What's the difference between a car and 10 dead babies? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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penis in the camel

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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