There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

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what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Is Carly smart? No.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and cross back again? Because he was a dirty double crosser

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

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How do you make someone cry? Shit on them

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

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Where did susie go after the explosion? everywhere. What was susie after the explosion? a puzzle.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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Hey

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So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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