Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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Why do sharks swim in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze! Why do whales swim in salt water? They can't survive in fresh water.

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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What do you call a barn full of black people? antique farm equipment.

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What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

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when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. when life gives you melons, you are soon diagnosed with dyslexia.

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a gay couple walks into a bar and get a drink

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What Do You Call Black People Skydiving? A fun time.

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Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

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3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

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Q: What did the dumb blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? A: Look! Donut seeds!

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why was the clown sad? died of cancer and left his loving family to fend for themselves in this cruel, cruel world.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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