Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

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there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

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Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

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Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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