What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

What did the skeleton say when he was horny? Nothing. Skeletons are not living and therefore cannot be horny.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Why was he arrested? He broke the law.

a man walks into horse bar

why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

So a black man, a white man and a latina walk into a sentence that doesn't end how you expected it to.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

What do you call two grown Mexican men playing tennis? Two adults showcasing their talent in a friendly game of tennis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...