why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

My Muslim friend is always late to everything. We call him 9/12.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

thumb_up thumb_down +28

whats white and pointless? chalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What do you call a successful black person? A: A fictional character.

thumb_up thumb_down -345

So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man did not like this site

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Doctor: Yes. Patient: I think I'm a moth! Doctor: You don't need a doctor, you need Mental help. Patient: Yes I know. Doctor: Then why are you here? Patient: The light was on.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops