On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? yea, neither has he.

Don't you just hate it when sentences don't end how you think they TESTACLES

Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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