Have I ever told you that you looked beautiful? No. Ok, good.

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A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

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What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

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What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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"MR PLATT!!!!!!" "Yeah?" "Telephone for you sir." "Oh, cheers Tony."

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why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

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Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

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Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck!

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Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

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I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

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What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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