How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

knock knock who's there boo boo who why are you crying it's just a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

thumb_up thumb_down -33

i like turtles

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's worse than having to tie one of your shoelaces after walking 5 miles? Getting a 56 year old mixture of blood, urine and sperm injected in your asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

wanna here a good joke? me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

POOP.............................................. ITS THE FUNNEST WORD OF ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why's everyone afraid of Friday the 13th? A: Justin Bieber's movie comes out.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

thumb_up thumb_down +77

A black guy gets a job...

thumb_up thumb_down

What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did you insult me and then punch me in the face? The hell if you care anymore, I killed you straight after. Neo-Nero. (Rest in peace Nero7 better known as The Moral Man, I hope I can one day live up to your greatness.) Moral: "Keep your spirits up, we are all going to die sometime, but life means nothing if we lose faith in ourselves and each other" Moral 2: "Nero Septimus, that will be my first and last moral that made a figment of fucking sense, if you are watching from whatever comes from life, I know that this is what you would have done, but just so you know and always wanted for us that followed you, I am doing this for my own goddamn fucking self, respects... Now if your ghost is still watching, get the fuck out of my room you damn cripple, and know that your arm is somewhere in the basement because its so goddamn bad ass that it fucking freaks me out, and so fucking heavy that I think you where some sort of superhuman, now gtfo, as you taught us, we cant focus on the goddamn afterlife, if we are gonna get the best out of life and the present, adios amigo"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops