A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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What did the man say when he saw a purple cow? Nothing. He was blind.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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Q:Whats worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A: 8 dead babies in a barrel. Q: Whats worse than that? A: A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

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Why did the lonely man stop talking? He was alone.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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whats a willy? -brock

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Two black guys jump off a bridge..who lands first? They would land at the same time due to earths gravity acting on them both with an equal force.

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1

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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roses are black violets are grey... im color blind sorry

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A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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