Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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what is worse tahn finding a worm in your apple? finding hitler in your house.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

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What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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poop.

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What's pink and fluffy? A feather duster.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Why did the black kid pass the exam? Because he studied.

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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