Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

thumb_up thumb_down +91

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

japan4.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If I could rearrange the alphabet I probably wouldn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than the Holicost? Bitting into an apple and finding a worm

thumb_up thumb_down

What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops