what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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What do you call 10 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call 1000 black people on the moon? A problem What do you call the population of black people on the moon? A huge problem

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suck my dick.

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what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

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Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy-wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy-wuzzy died of cancer.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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