Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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What is it worse than a bee sting ? -Two bee stings What 's worse than two bee stings ? -The holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust ? -3 bee stings

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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What's White and can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the janitor have for breakfast? Food

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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