Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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U ALL LIAK DIK

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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Illumati Confirmed

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Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

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Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

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What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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